For the last few weeks I have been watching my beautiful 16 year old Bella cat wasting away and getting more and more frail.
My girl has seen me through some of the toughest times in my life.
She has been by my side when no one else was.
She has been around longer than my husband.
My heart breaks to see her struggle.
It breaks to see her shed weight and look unwell.
She still greets me with a purr and a meow. She still jumps up on the bed or beckons me to pick her up and put her beside me on the bed.
Some people will say........ it is just a cat.
No she is not.
Bella is my fur child, my friend, the most loving girl you could ask for.
I am hoping that this is just a blip in the road and that she will pick up and live a longer healthy life with me.
If her time is up........ then go well my baby......
Wednesday, 28 January 2015
Saturday, 24 January 2015
"10 Habits of Emotionally Resilient People" by Amita Patel.........lessons for me to learn
10 Habits Of Emotionally Resilient People - By Amita Patel
(shared from the MindBodyGreen website www.mindbodygreen.com )
Ever notice how some people are stressed during transitions while others can just roll with the punches? It all comes down to emotional resilience. While some of it may be biological, there are ten traits that you can start cultivating today to start living life with less resistance and more ease:
Here are ten things that emotionally resilient people do when faced with a difficult situation:
1. Wait for what's right instead of acting on what you want right now.
Yup, just like the classic Stanford marshmallow experiment, this is about impulse control — the ability to stop and consider whether you want to act on a desire. For example, when a family member makes you angry, your immediate response might be to lash out. However, impulse control allows you to pause and assess whether that's really the best course of action in the long run. Delaying gratification and controlling our urges allows us to choose actions that align with our best intentions.
2. Sit with discomfort.
Similar to the above tip, those who are emotionally resilient are able to tolerate discomfort. Remember that thing you said out of anger? Or out of hunger? How would that response have been different if you had tolerated your discomfort for an hour? While tip one was about choosing the best action, this is about sitting with an emotion without taking any action.
3. Get some perspective.
If you've ever said to yourself, "Hindsight is 20/20" then you recognize the possibility that it may be true for your current situation. Often, when we're in the trenches, it's hard to see the bigger picture. Sometimes things happen for you, not TO you. What seems painful now might actually be the gift you couldn't give yourself.
4. Practice acceptance.
Acceptance is not the same as complacence. It's not about giving up and letting the stress take over — it's about experiencing your emotions and trusting that you'll bounce back.
5. Remember the power of time.
The emotionally resilient remember that time heals all wounds. People who have a tendency to feel depressed often fear spiraling back into it, but feeling an emotion is not the same as getting caught in it. Think back to the last time you felt like this. You may have thought it was the end of the world, but you recovered. The same is true now.
6. Let go of having all the answers right now.
Often, when we try hard to find answers to challenging questions, we unknowingly put our blinders on. We are so consumed with having answers on our schedule that we forget that we only receive when we are ready. The emotionally resilient remember that it's okay to not have it all figured out.
7. Engage in self-care.
Emotionally resilient people know that self-care is a non-negotiable. It's a daily practice and commitment to self that strengthens their inner resolve. Ranging from exercise, to meditation, to a cup of tea, the resilient have go-to stress busters that don't involve hitting the bottle.
8. Laugh it off.
Sometimes things just suck, and you simply need to laugh it off. Humor goes a long way.
9. Choose to be happy above being right.
Emotionally resilient people know that being right is not what will make them happy. Sure, it's nice to be right, but it's better to be happy. Ask yourself if picking a fight is really worth it. Are you fighting to resolve the situation, or fighting to win it? In any moment you can choose what's more important to you: the relationship or your pride.
10. Instead of focusing on what's wrong, the resilient focus on what's right.
Remember, where attention goes, energy flows. So why not cultivate more of what you want instead of what you don't. There's always something to be thankful for.
Ultimately, emotional resilience is all about attitude. By practicing these ten responses to stress, you'll be able to spend more time living with ease and grace, spending more time in the light with fleeting moments of darkness!
1. Wait for what's right instead of acting on what you want right now.
Yup, just like the classic Stanford marshmallow experiment, this is about impulse control — the ability to stop and consider whether you want to act on a desire. For example, when a family member makes you angry, your immediate response might be to lash out. However, impulse control allows you to pause and assess whether that's really the best course of action in the long run. Delaying gratification and controlling our urges allows us to choose actions that align with our best intentions.
2. Sit with discomfort.
Similar to the above tip, those who are emotionally resilient are able to tolerate discomfort. Remember that thing you said out of anger? Or out of hunger? How would that response have been different if you had tolerated your discomfort for an hour? While tip one was about choosing the best action, this is about sitting with an emotion without taking any action.
3. Get some perspective.
If you've ever said to yourself, "Hindsight is 20/20" then you recognize the possibility that it may be true for your current situation. Often, when we're in the trenches, it's hard to see the bigger picture. Sometimes things happen for you, not TO you. What seems painful now might actually be the gift you couldn't give yourself.
4. Practice acceptance.
Acceptance is not the same as complacence. It's not about giving up and letting the stress take over — it's about experiencing your emotions and trusting that you'll bounce back.
5. Remember the power of time.
The emotionally resilient remember that time heals all wounds. People who have a tendency to feel depressed often fear spiraling back into it, but feeling an emotion is not the same as getting caught in it. Think back to the last time you felt like this. You may have thought it was the end of the world, but you recovered. The same is true now.
6. Let go of having all the answers right now.
Often, when we try hard to find answers to challenging questions, we unknowingly put our blinders on. We are so consumed with having answers on our schedule that we forget that we only receive when we are ready. The emotionally resilient remember that it's okay to not have it all figured out.
7. Engage in self-care.
Emotionally resilient people know that self-care is a non-negotiable. It's a daily practice and commitment to self that strengthens their inner resolve. Ranging from exercise, to meditation, to a cup of tea, the resilient have go-to stress busters that don't involve hitting the bottle.
8. Laugh it off.
Sometimes things just suck, and you simply need to laugh it off. Humor goes a long way.
9. Choose to be happy above being right.
Emotionally resilient people know that being right is not what will make them happy. Sure, it's nice to be right, but it's better to be happy. Ask yourself if picking a fight is really worth it. Are you fighting to resolve the situation, or fighting to win it? In any moment you can choose what's more important to you: the relationship or your pride.
10. Instead of focusing on what's wrong, the resilient focus on what's right.
Remember, where attention goes, energy flows. So why not cultivate more of what you want instead of what you don't. There's always something to be thankful for.
Ultimately, emotional resilience is all about attitude. By practicing these ten responses to stress, you'll be able to spend more time living with ease and grace, spending more time in the light with fleeting moments of darkness!
Thursday, 22 January 2015
Trust is earned not given easily...............
I have had the biggest crash today. This combined with a spike in my blood pressure.
My whole system seems to have flared up to a level that I previously have been at about 12 months ago.
I guess it feels like groundhog day.
My inner voice was screaming this morning and as usual it was right.
When someone you love is not truthful and you don't know where the trust has gone in a relationship...... how can you continue??????
Judge Judy always says........"If it does not make sense....... then it is a lie"
Going through the same issues, feeling betrayed and used is not how life should be.
I feel sick to my stomach, stupid for believing the lies and at this time do not know how to move forward.
So many hopes and dreams simply shattered into a thousand pieces.
Unfortunately this is not the first time it has happened.
When will I learn????
My whole system seems to have flared up to a level that I previously have been at about 12 months ago.
I guess it feels like groundhog day.
My inner voice was screaming this morning and as usual it was right.
When someone you love is not truthful and you don't know where the trust has gone in a relationship...... how can you continue??????
Judge Judy always says........"If it does not make sense....... then it is a lie"
Going through the same issues, feeling betrayed and used is not how life should be.
I feel sick to my stomach, stupid for believing the lies and at this time do not know how to move forward.
So many hopes and dreams simply shattered into a thousand pieces.
Unfortunately this is not the first time it has happened.
When will I learn????
Saturday, 10 January 2015
What does the Universe have in store for me??
Today is the tenth day of the New Year.
I have been working hard on my health by doing research, participating in health forums and deciphering what path is right for me and my adrenal healing.
2015 is the year for moving forward.
The Universe I am sure has a great plan for me.
Just when you think you know what is best for you.................. the rug slips out from under you.
My Husband and I have not been in a position to buy the property we thought we had our hearts set on.
I looked today and 5 days ago......... it was sold.
So obviously it was not the right place to call home.
I was disappointed.
Time to release it back to the Universe and manifest the right place to call home.
I have been working hard on my health by doing research, participating in health forums and deciphering what path is right for me and my adrenal healing.
2015 is the year for moving forward.
The Universe I am sure has a great plan for me.
Just when you think you know what is best for you.................. the rug slips out from under you.
My Husband and I have not been in a position to buy the property we thought we had our hearts set on.
I looked today and 5 days ago......... it was sold.
So obviously it was not the right place to call home.
I was disappointed.
Time to release it back to the Universe and manifest the right place to call home.
Tuesday, 6 January 2015
2015...... Searching for the glass half full.........
2015 arrived with more of a fizzle rather than a bang.
My Mum has been very unwell with her back so it really didn't feel like Christmas.
There is a lot of family stuff going on right now and the whole world feels like it is not quite on it's axis.
One thing that still amazes me in this lifetime is when someone continues to do the same thing time and time again expecting that the outcome is going to change.
I am sure someone once said that this is the definition of stupidity.
All I know is that talking to the person and trying to point out the fact that they may not have learned the lesson from the last few times they did the same thing sometimes does not work.
Hard to tell someone that they will continually be presented with the lesson until they is sometimes a concept that people do not get.
I am hoping that 2015 will turn around and be the year that it has promised to be.
My Mum has been very unwell with her back so it really didn't feel like Christmas.
There is a lot of family stuff going on right now and the whole world feels like it is not quite on it's axis.
One thing that still amazes me in this lifetime is when someone continues to do the same thing time and time again expecting that the outcome is going to change.
I am sure someone once said that this is the definition of stupidity.
All I know is that talking to the person and trying to point out the fact that they may not have learned the lesson from the last few times they did the same thing sometimes does not work.
Hard to tell someone that they will continually be presented with the lesson until they is sometimes a concept that people do not get.
I am hoping that 2015 will turn around and be the year that it has promised to be.
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